Working off of that quote, I can only conclude that "Seizure Katie" has DECIDED she likes me to wear my coffee. I mean... what is the deal? She clearly didn't find it to be a mistake the second time, I have witnesses and they said it looked pretty much like she knew what she was doing.
So, going off of that, what the hell, Seizure Katie?!
Yesterday was a normal morning. Randy and I were having coffee,
we were watching Brody play with the dogs, Quinn was trying to get us to give her some coffee. And then my aura started. I looked at Randy and I said "Oh no" (or maybe I said "Oh shit") and then I don't remember anything until I was up in my closet being told to change out of my pajamas because I was covered in coffee. So, I was defeated for the rest of the morning.
By mid-afternoon, I was feeling better about it. Sometimes I get to the point where I just want to laugh about it instead of feeling defeated and knew I could rely on Brody for that. So I asked him for his POV of the seizure and the situation. He said "Mom... This one was weird. I was playing on the floor, right? I had the dogs and dog toy and we were playing. And then all of sudden, Randy said "Brody! Get her cup, get her cup!" And I didn't know what he meant at first, and then I realized he meant your cup and I turned around just in time to see you just... And he mimicked what my space out face looks like (or what I'm told my space out face looks like) so well, and then showed me the way my hand just sort of tipped my coffee cup over. "And Mom! You just.... dumped your coffee out. You just stared at nothing and poured your coffee out and didn't even care. What if it had still been hot?! Oh man Mom... You're so lucky it wasn't hot. And I am sorry I am kind of giggling but you should have seen your face." and it's ok, because I was kind of giggling too. And then he told me about how I sort of, did a repetitive motion with my fingers and created a pattern with them once Randy took my coffee cup away- which is totally normal for my seizures. The coffee thing is new, but the repetitive motions is not. I knew getting an 11 year olds take on things would make it a little easier to deal with. (Just a little though.)
I also had a moment this morning when I was approached by a friend- she's wondering if I have advice for someone she knows who is going to be getting surgery for epilepsy. And I would like to say that I can't believe that's another person that I know who knows someone or just another person that I know... but 1 in 26 people will develop epilepsy in their lifetime. I feel like I need to throw that out there every once in a while in case someone didn't see that before. Counting me, there are 7 people I can name right now that either have it or someone close to them does and that is crazy- not NEARLY enough is done or known about epilepsy. There is still a huge stigma, people are still stupid and making jokes, and I hope there is more awareness soon.
1 in 26.
Thursday, January 23, 2020
Tuesday, January 14, 2020
It's no use crying over spilt milk... But maybe coffee
On Sunday, I spilled coffee all over myself. And I don't even know how or when I did it. That's the joy of seizures- of my kind of seizures, you lose track of time and space out for a minute and have no idea what the hell just happened. So on Sunday, I was the first one awake, I made the coffee like I was always do and I had myself a cup. I was sitting on my favorite chair, looking out the window, watching the rain- I think, I honestly don't remember what I was doing, but I think I was watching whatever was happening outside, I may have been watching my dogs play on the carpet, who knows? And then all of a sudden, I was leaving the bathroom. And I saw my coffee mug sitting on the counter, empty, and I thought "Wow, that's weird, I finished it already?" and so I filled it up again. And I sat back down on my favorite chair and that's when I noticed my shirt was wet. Confused, I thought for a minute I got my shirt wet in the bathroom, then I panicked thinking it dipped into the toilet since the shirt is long and I was tired. Then I started to add everything together... Wet shirt, empty coffee cup, no idea how coffee cup was really empty, or how I ended up walking back from the bathroom- I mean, had I actually USED the restroom, or was I just walking back from that area? Damn.
And I had just had two on Friday. Cool.
I looked around. Coffee all over the chair, all over the carpet, and after a better investigation, all over me. I walked to the kitchen. I - NO WAIT- Seizure Katie, had also started to pack a school lunch for my son, which is just so dumb because A) he was with his dad, and B) It was Sunday. So Seizure Katie was up to all sorts of shenanigans, spilling coffee all over the place, packing lunches for no reason, just keeping me on my toes.
My husband was still asleep. I was just sitting here trying to figure out if I wanted to laugh or cry. I finally decided that the best option was to have more coffee, wait until my husband was awake to change my clothes and to hold it all in. When he woke up, he told me I was ridiculous for sitting there in wet pajamas but he had been sick all week and was finally getting sleep so I didn't want to disturb him. I focused my energy on cleaning the chair and the carpet instead.
On Monday, I had a million errands I wanted to run but couldn't because I can't drive. And several appointments I needed to make but I can't actually make them because I have to make sure they work around other peoples schedules because they are the ones that drive me places otherwise I have to Uber and Ubering to doctor appointments is weird- trust me, I've done it. A lot.
And that's when it happened. That's when I started to cry and get angry because I spilled my coffee. Isn't it funny and SO STUPID how that all works? The whole "Straw that broke the camels back" thing?
I meet with the neurosurgeon soon and I'm getting a million more tests and maybe I'm on my way to having this crap behind me. January 27th, we find out what he has to say and on February 6th I go in for the Neuropsych exam and functional MRI- which is just my favorite (I bet you can feel my eyes rolling through your screen) and then hopefully we will know if I am a candidate for RNS procedure or not.
Once upon time, I was an independent woman who drove herself to the grocery store, and took her kids to school, and drove herself to WORK... and someday that will be me again... As soon as I figure out how to drink coffee without spilling it all over myself.
And I had just had two on Friday. Cool.
I looked around. Coffee all over the chair, all over the carpet, and after a better investigation, all over me. I walked to the kitchen. I - NO WAIT- Seizure Katie, had also started to pack a school lunch for my son, which is just so dumb because A) he was with his dad, and B) It was Sunday. So Seizure Katie was up to all sorts of shenanigans, spilling coffee all over the place, packing lunches for no reason, just keeping me on my toes.
My husband was still asleep. I was just sitting here trying to figure out if I wanted to laugh or cry. I finally decided that the best option was to have more coffee, wait until my husband was awake to change my clothes and to hold it all in. When he woke up, he told me I was ridiculous for sitting there in wet pajamas but he had been sick all week and was finally getting sleep so I didn't want to disturb him. I focused my energy on cleaning the chair and the carpet instead.
On Monday, I had a million errands I wanted to run but couldn't because I can't drive. And several appointments I needed to make but I can't actually make them because I have to make sure they work around other peoples schedules because they are the ones that drive me places otherwise I have to Uber and Ubering to doctor appointments is weird- trust me, I've done it. A lot.
And that's when it happened. That's when I started to cry and get angry because I spilled my coffee. Isn't it funny and SO STUPID how that all works? The whole "Straw that broke the camels back" thing?
I meet with the neurosurgeon soon and I'm getting a million more tests and maybe I'm on my way to having this crap behind me. January 27th, we find out what he has to say and on February 6th I go in for the Neuropsych exam and functional MRI- which is just my favorite (I bet you can feel my eyes rolling through your screen) and then hopefully we will know if I am a candidate for RNS procedure or not.
Once upon time, I was an independent woman who drove herself to the grocery store, and took her kids to school, and drove herself to WORK... and someday that will be me again... As soon as I figure out how to drink coffee without spilling it all over myself.
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